Everything Happens For A Reason

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please, everyone read this. it’s important & i know it’s long, but trust me it is worth your time. please reblog this & share with your friends.

my story

my name is jordan nicole moreno. i am currently 14 years old & i live in california. tumblr is not only a way for me to express myself and how i feel, but to help others overcome their difficulties and try and change people lives. sometimes you feel like nothing will ever get better and that your world is coming to an end, but in reality it’s not. things will get better, maybe not instantely, but eventually they will. always think to yourself, will this matter in a year, because it probably won’t. be thankful for what you do have and even what you don’t because you never know when it could be taken away from you. just cherish every moment in life and treat others how you would want to be treated. don’t judge and always be nice to everyone, there’s no point in being mean, it just makes you look like an asshole. so i made this page to let you know that you can be happy even after bad things happen to you, so here it goes. my parents & i used to fight all the time. we could never get along. at one point i was even supposed to move in with my aunt. my parents used to always fight because of me & it had gotten so bad to where my dad had considered moving out because of me & my parents were talking about getting a divorce because of me. i felt horrible because it was literally all my fault, but things with my parents have gotten so much better because i finally realized how stupid & immature i used to be and how terrbile i used to treat them. once i stepped back & took a look at everything that i had said & done, it changed my outlook on things. anyways back to my story, i really miss my bestfriend. i havent seen or talked to her in what seems like months. its not because were fighting or anything, we’ve just grown apart & i miss her more than anything. i haven’t had a true bestfriend in years & i wish i had that, that one person you can tell everything too, that one person who is always there for you when everyone walks out on you, but i don’t have that, but one day, i know i will. on top of that, i am suffering from severe depression, but everytime i try & open up to someone about it they think im stupid & that im lying & they tell me to shutup. i mean why in the world would i lie about something like that & i cant help it if im depressed, it just happens & it runs in thee family. i used to take depression medication & go to therapy once a week, & i used to have many thoughts of suicide, but still no one believed me. but i’m better now, it’s still always gonna be here, but i am happy. i enjoy life & take every opportunity i can before it’s to late. life is beautiful & i’m so thankful for the life i have. anyways, i know people have it worse off than i do , but i still have problems just like they do. i hate myself & everything about me. i am so insecure and self-conscious. i always feel so ugly, fat, worthless, and like i’m never good enough & i really wish i didnt. i hate how my uncle does drugs & takes our stuff & sells it to buy more. i hate how my aunts wife just uses her for her money. i hate how my uncle’s wife is such a skank & that she cheated on him while he was in iraq fighting for our country. i hate how my grandpa works three jobs to support his kids who are almost 30 & they give him nothing in return. i hate how my four year old cousin was molested a year ago. i hate how i havent talked to my uncle al, aunt theresa & my cousins in a year. i hate how i haven’t talked to or seen my grandpa bob, grandma betty, auntie erica & auntie penny in 4 years. i hate how my auntie erica has two kids now & that i will never get to know them, let alone get to see them. i hate how they had to screw us over & threaten to kill our family, over something soo stupid, which all started with a motorhome. i hate how i miss them soo much even after all they did to us. i hate how i will never see my grandma again, because she’s spending the rest of her life in prison. i hate how my aunt died of breast cancer & how my cousin is also suffering from it. i hate how my grandma marry is dying from melanoma, as well as lung cancer. she has only 3 months left. i hate how much my nana smokes & how i have this horrible feeling that she’s going to die soon if she’s doesn’t stop. i hate how nobody helps my auntie deedee, she has no car & no house. no one is there for her. i hate how my auntie espie doesn’t take care of herself. she almost died a few months ago because she’s a diabetic & she didn’t control her blood sugar or take her medication. i hate how my uncle bob became an alcholic & ruined his life & then once he finally fixed everything, we all find out that he’s been cheating on his wife for the past two years. i love him, but i looked up to him so much, & he let me down. i hate how my auntie laura lost over 100 pounds & then gained it all back and then her jackass boyfriend dumped her because she was “too fat .” i hate how my dad & nana don’t get along all because of some stupid fight they had seven years ago. i hate that my grandma lee died almost a year ago, i miss her & think of her everyday. i hate how my auntie tina died of a flesh eating diease, which ate her body from the inside out, three years ago on christmas eve. i hate how i never see my uncle craig, my aunts & my cousins. i hate how none of my family gets along, they can’t go an hour without fighting. i hate how my parents expect me to be some perfect angel & never make any mistakes. i hate how they never let me forget how disgusting, wrong & stupid of me it was to send nudes to this guys i loved. i hate how they always bring it up & use it against me just like the rest of the people i go to school with. i hate how no one thinks i know what i did was wrong & how they still think im some stupid hoe. i know i made a mistake, but life doesn’t come with instructions. everyone makes mistakes, i just happened to make a big one, but i learned from it. i hate how some stupid girl had to tell everyone in school about my nudes & how the office found our from some jerk who ratted me out & then called my parents. i hate how everyday when i went to school, i would loose atleast one friend because of it & how only a few people would talk to me for months. i hate how people still judge me because of something i did in seventh grade. i hate when people judge me, they know my name & they might have heard what i’ve done, but they dont know my story. i hate how all my friends moms know what i did & some won’t talk to me and the others think of me differently. im just a good girl that made a bad decision , but no one lets me forget it. i hate how everyday i get made fun of because of the way i walk, it really hurts, because it’s something i can’t do anything about, someone people are even so shallow that they tell they’re friends they won’t date me or even consider liking me because of it. i hate how i compare every guy to this guy that i used to be in love with & i hate how he broke my heart. even after all this has happened to me, i just continue to smile and hold my head up high. i still never give up hope that things are going to be better one day. just be happy and thankful for what and who you have in your life and always remember that things will get better. i promise. if anyone reading this ever needs someone to talk to, i’m that person. you can tell me anything, i won’t judge you & i will try to give you the best advice i can. i just want you to feel like someone is there for you & that you are not alone. you’re beautiful & don’t ever forget it. stay strong.

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